I’m no relationship guru, but I’ve experienced both the cyber-relationship and the real all the time kind of, in the flesh, relationship. Ok, no I didn’t really have a “cyber-relationship” but I did try to make a distance relationship work with the help of technology. I dated a boy from my high school for three and a half years before we called things off. After graduation he went to run track at one of the Philly schools and I came to Rutgers. Our first year apart was difficult but with text messaging, FaceTime and social media we made it work. However, I wasn’t very happy anymore. I’m not a jealous person, and I trusted my boyfriend 100% but when the only way you can communicate for nine months is through some sort of technology you start wondering what your significant other is doing. It’s natural and I wouldn’t say I was crazy for getting a little on edge about things.
When sophomore year came around I finally was honest with him. I told him that not being able to see him was hard for me. A lot of couples in the whole long-distance thing can see each other on a couple weekends or such. Due to his track schedule, we couldn’t even do that. And as much as I loved him I needed someone who could be there…actually there for me. So needless to say, the cyber-relationship was not for me and it did not help things end very well for me.
But hey, I’m just one person.
After watching the short film Noah, my concern isn’t so much in cyber-relationships, but in trust. The readings for today did a nice job at touching upon trust. However, I do not think that cyber-relationship ruin trust, I think today’s society ruins trust.
We now live in a world where it’s so easy to lie, sneak, and steal. So can we blame Noah for feeling on edge? Do we blame him for snooping around? I sure don’t. If the opportunity presents itself I know most of us would indeed snoop, whether we admit that or not.
I think that trust issues which is a make or break a relationship don’t start because a relationship is formed online- I believe that these trust issues are because of society. Movies and TV shows leave us to believe that all partners will cheat and a happy relationship is nearly impossible. Even social media- people either post about being so happy in a relationship in which that point you believe it to be fake, or they post about how awful their relationship is. And why is it that we don’t believe the happiness, but we believe the sadness.
Society has molded us into believing that trust is impossible to find and therefore we put up walls and barriers that are impossible to knock down. Because of this we feel the need to snoop around. Apparently the only way we can feel comfortable in a relationship is if we check our partner’s Facebook messages or text messages.